And there he was. It was a bit of a surprise seeing someone, seeing him. I had just entered the room and didn’t expect anyone. He was tall. Handsome one might say, blue eyes, full beard which is something I like. He was a little advanced in his age, showing a few gray strands in his beard. His head was shaved, but I don’t mind that at all if it’s clean and tidy. His physique was appealing as well. He had an athletic build, not too muscular but also not too skinny. He probably exercised regularly which is a nice touch, I could see he’s trying to take care of himself. His clothes were tidy, casual yet well fitted. It was clear he cared about his looks but wasn’t trying too hard. He looked like a kind, confident person. Someone you could share your hopes and dreams with, lean on and always be supported. Someone lovable, genuine. Someone to feel safe with.
I did notice he was surprised to see me, as well. His expression seemed like what I imagined mine looked like right then. So there we were, staring at each other without motion, gauging each other and letting the surprise pass. There undoubtedly was a connection. A familiarity, a bond of experiences past, a togetherness. A deep, deep longing, a pull towards each other which couldn’t be denied. In his eyes, in his presence I felt home, like I belonged. It was even more than that. I could fiercely identify with him, an inert pleasant feeling of having known him for many years. I was struggling to remain calm.
I felt it all becoming too much for me. The ferocity of the connection, my feelings emerging so strongly. It was truly a once in a life time occurrence. In the end I couldn’t take it any longer. I took all my courage guided by my emotions and stepped in for an embrace. Seize the moment, now or never. I hit the mirror with my hands then my head.
Fuck, I really need to drink less.